You ever feel like you're obligated to put on a happy face before going somewhere, just so that people wouldn't have to make fun of how you're really feeling inside?
The thing is, it feels like i have something that's not letting me be happy. And here's the catch, I have no idea what that thing is. It's the feeling where I just think that something's amiss, and yet this point of my life has never felt better, than ever. And yet still, something IS amiss.
SPM is a very big deal to me, and I'm sure to those of you who are 136 turning 17 this year. Maybe that's what's pushing me to get up everyday, study for a few hours, and after that, go back to sleep. It doesn't give me time to really stop and just relax. And right now, I'm afraid of relaxing, 'cause that "problem", whatever it is, will naturally come back to me, even if I don't think about it.
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The only reassuring thing about this bit is that, everytime I pray, God delivers.
Even if it's for something I asked, but truthfully didn't want to know.
This picture never gets old. I miss that house...
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